Problems Don’t Go Away on Their Own

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The right attitude is everything, but sometimes you have to change the environment in order to feel differently. A positive outlook is great but you can’t fix everything just by trying to change the way you look at things. Real problems need real solutions, not just reframing and giving them different names and pretending to be okay with whatever is happening.

Stop trying to adapt to problems, instead, face and address the problems. Problems don’t go away on their own. More often than not, problems tend to grow bigger when ignored.

Crap stinks no matter how you look at it. If it stinks, it doesn’t matter how you look at it, it will continue to stink. If it stinks, no amount of meditation, affirmations, and vision boards will make the stink go away. Why trying to force yourself to like the stink. Remove the stink from your environment or remove yourself from that environment.

Sadly, very often, I see clients asking to help them feel better, to learn to ignore and adapt to whatever bad situation they are in. They ask to help them to feel safer and learn to relax in an unsafe environment. They ask to help them to heal their heartache while they are choosing to stay in abusive relationships. They are trying to fix themself as though there is something wrong with them.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you if you are reacting badly to bad treatment. You trying to fix yourself won’t fix the people that are trying to hurt you. Teach them how to treat you or remove them from your life (you really should either way).

Trying to get therapy without removing the source of your pain is like applying a band-aid while someone is stabbing you with a knife

Don’t try to numb yourself. Instead, evaluate your situation. If you’ve been stack in the negative environment for too long, your perception of what is right and what is wrong may be hindered. And that would be a good reason to see a counselor. If that is not possible, try to look at the situation from outside. Imagine that it’s your best friend or a loved one was in that situation, what would you tell them? The things just hit differently when they hurt your loved one instead of you.

Possibly now, you can see your situation more clearly and it will be easier for you to take the right actions.

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